Here’s Mr. Cool Alex in his Thanksgiving day clothes (click for larger image).  More can be seen here in the November album.

Yes everybody, this is what my 3 year old son has been obsessing over for the past few months.  For whatever reason when we got a Halloween costume catalog a few months ago THIS is what he decided he wanted to be.  A Garden Gnome.  For a second we were relived that the biggest it came in from the catalog was a 2T.  Then this week while shopping at Walmart Jen saw it in bigger sizes.

So, Alex got his “Gnome Guard” and he will be a happy boy this Halloween.  Crazy kid!

You have to love the mind of a 2 year old boy.

Yesterday as I was getting the twins ready for their nap, or maybe it was up from the nap, I heard Alex say pee-pee. He had a run a couple of weeks ago where he decided he wasn’t potty trained anymore, so I’ve been more alert than usual for potty words. He was sitting in his bed, and I asked him if he needed to go, and he said, “No, my flying monkey pee-pee on my milk.” He has this toy from a Happy Meal Pop-Pop got for him:

I asked how his monkey was peeing on his milk. He held up the monkey and showed me. The monkey’s head was turned totally backwards so the wings and tail appeared to be in the front. The tail didn’t look like a tail from that angle. And sure enough, my son said, “See? There his penis, pee pee on my milk.”

Then there was the incident two weeks ago when we were headed into a store, and Avery and Alex were getting out of the back of the van. To do that, they have to sit down and hang their legs over the bumper before jumping down. Alex was first and Avery sat down behind him a little too quickly, accidentally kicking him in the back. As we were walking in to the store, with both of them holding on to Adam’s stroller like good little angels, Alex unmistakeably looked at Avery and said, “Aisy knuckle sandwich.” His usage was a little off – he was calling her a knuckle sandwich rather than offering to give her one, but I realized it’s definitely time to start watching what I say around them!

After Alex went over the crib again last week and limped for three days, we thought it best to either put on the crib tent or convert his crib to a toddler bed, which meant just removing the front and replacing it with a small rail to keep him from falling out. So Saturday morning, Alex & Daddy brought out the tools and put on the rail. We also gated his room off so even if he opened the door, he wouldn’t have the run of the house. Here’s how the transition went.

Saturday: Nap was perfect, and so was bedtime. He climbed right in and stayed there. I was beyond shocked that it was this easy.

Sunday: Just like Saturday. So I was thinking this was going to be a breeze. No adjustment issues for MY son.

Monday: Nap was great, but somewhere around 2 a.m. it finally occurred to him that he could get out of the bed whenever he wanted. Like 2:00, to pee. And 2:10, to say he had to poop when he didn’t really. And 2:15 to open and close the bedroom door a few times. And 2:17 to play with books and stuffed animals. By then I said forget it about getting up and putting him back in bed – let him play and he’d eventually fall asleep, be it in the bed or on the floor. But I was tired, so I went back to sleep.

Tuesday: Woke up around 7 and stood at his door, saying “Mommy? Mommy! Assah wake!” Another good nap. And finally, a night when it took him a while to fall asleep. I am not remembering anything in particular, but I am sure he didn’t just stay in bed at bedtime.

Wednesday: Alex woke a little earlier than usual and knocked the gate down to come into Adam’s room and tell me he was awake. I made a mental note to tighten the gate. Naptime was fine. Bedtime was nuts. We could tell he was probably out of bed, but were letting it slide. Finally, at around 9 I went back in to tell them both to stop giggling and go to sleep. I found Alex sitting outside Avery’s crib, laughing, and Avery sitting on top of every freaking book they own. He’d thrown three little crates full of books into her crib. Oh, they thought it was hilarious. She couldn’t have gone to sleep if she wanted to – there was no mattress even visible. So I cleaned them out and put him back to bed and told the kids to GO TO SLEEP!

Thursday: Alex woke before 7. I snuck into the shower and planned to get him once I was clean. The gate was extra tight to prevent him from knocking it over. So, showing great ingenuity, he hauled over a chair and must have stood on it and gone over the gate, because he greeted me in the bathroom, and the chair and gate greeted me at the door to their room. Lovely, no worries for broken legs there, right? (Which is what the whole bed thing was about in the first place.) No nap because we went to the zoo. At bedtime, they were so exhausted, they did pretty much go right to sleep. But at 8:45 or so, Avery cried out, so I went to check on her and damn near stepped on Alex when I went in. He was crashed out in the middle of the floor with his binky in his mouth, so I moved him back to bed and he stayed there.

I cannot imagine trying to do this with them both at the same time. For now, I am thankful that their new pet fish, who live on their dressers, haven’t been upended in his wanderings. I’ll worry about Avery being in a bed in, oh, a year or so. And Adam will never have this transition because at this rate, he’ll be sleeping in a swing til he leaves for college.

No, we’re not wasted away in Margaritaville. But a mom can dream…

Earlier this week, we had a playdate at a friend’s house and rushed home just in time for a quick lunch for the twins. Adam was very tired, so after plunking the twins down at the kitchen table with some munchies, I took Adam to his room to feed, rock, and put down for a nap. It’s a quick and easy job when he’s so sleepy, maybe 5 minutes. And the twins are used to eating on their own at that table while I deal with the baby. They’ll wander in with messy hands to tell me if they need something usually.

In hindsight, I should have known it seemed too quiet in the kitchen, I suppose. But I enjoyed the peace and time with Adam. I walked back into the kitchen ready to wipe them off, hit the potty, and do the naptime routine. But I found piles of salt. Everywhere. Like a whole shaker full. On the floor. On their plates. On the table. On their clothes. On their hands and faces. In their hair. Oh, and they were sooooo pleased with themselves. And they were already headed for a late nap even before the mess.

“Who did this????” I asked.

Avery proudly replied, “Avery and Alex did this!” Huge smile. She was thrilled.

Alex added, “Assah needed peppah sauce.”

Oh, well, that explains it.

The real problem is that the salt shaker had been clogged. And I clearly remember last week when Don went to salt something on his dinner plate, found the clog, and cleared it. A little too well, I guess.
Lesson learned.

I was out tutoring last Thursday (the 17th,) and Don was handling bedtime for all 3 kids. At one point, he left Adam in the aquarium bouncy seat in his room, and the twins were in with him, while Don went to refill Avery’s cup of water. He was heading back to the room when he heard Adam suddenly crying. Those two little beasts had managed to FLIP the baby UPSIDE DOWN in the bouncy seat. Like, nose on the carpet, suspended from the t-strap, wire base up in the air, upside down. Don didn’t even ask for an explanation, he just grabbed Adam and tried to comfort him since he said the poor guy looked so terrified and was so upset. And he said the twins looked like they knew they had messed up bigtime, so he just told them they’d been very bad and put them to bed. I asked today, and of course they both could tell me all about it, but when I asked who flipped it, Alex said “Easy” and she said “Awix.” Those turkeys know how to work that twins thing, that’s for sure. Adam seems no worse for the wear, though I kept him out of that bouncer today so as not to give him some PTSD episode. Things like this are why God made him so big, I think. He’s gonna have to be able to fight back very, very soon!

Literally. Monday was just plain gross.

Adam pooped in his jumper while the twins ate lunch. Down his leg, to the floor, so he was dancing in it. Yuck.

Alex pooped in his underwear when he woke up from his nap, before I went in to get him. I stopped doing pull-ups at naptime because they were always dry. Double yuck.

And Avery had her normal naptime one too. She waited until yesterday, the one day I’ve ever let her sleep in her tutu, to have her first gross leaky diaper in probably a year. She got her sheets, the mattress pad, her skirt, and, of course, the damn tutu. Triple yuck.

And for good measure, Alex the potty trained wonder, who finally tells us when he has to pee or poop, pooped in his underwear after dinner tonight. Quadruple yuck.

I think we need to cut back on the fruit in this house or something.

I am so.done.with.poop!